Planet Notion - Studio Valbonne w/Jade Jagger & Calum Best, Studio Valbonne, 8th May

01/05/2008

There are certain people in the capital who have an unnerving desire to be recognized in the public eye and seek such recognition by regularly turning up to club nights attended by the glitterati. Who knows, maybe they pass themselves off as a friend of a friend of Kate Moss’ gynecologist or something equally as glam, in the vain hope that they’ll end-up in the Bizarre column or get snapped showing a little more than their panties whilst hopping from a taxi? Anyway, here at Planet Notion we feel that it’s our duty to inform the celebrity wannabe of such nights - nights where catching a glimpse of the star of stars becomes a reality. We are of course referring to a new night from JayLa Enterprises taking place at Studio Valbonne every Thursday from the 8th of May.

Classy events that are likely to attract such celebrities need to supply an atmosphere that they can feel secure and happy in. This is an indisputable fact; a given. As such Studio Valbonne will (to quote) supply “a mash up of anything from Kasabian mixed in with Jay Z, to 80’s punk rock mixed with pop”. So whilst Kirsty from Essex (a friend of Gok Wan) leaps about in her micro-skirt to Timbaland’s latest smash-hit, Boy George can remain confident, while sipping his ‘Sex on the Beach’, that the Pet shop Boys will soon be playing. And while Kirsty from Essex and Boy George make formal introductions Burlesque girls will leap from Giant Martini Glasses whilst a red carpet greets the latest arrivals…

“Oh,” I hear you cry, “but who will be performing on the night?” Why, celebrities of course. Yes, hosting the back room will be Pam Hogg. “Oh,” you cry once again, “but who is this… this Pam Hogg?” Pam Hogg is Vivien Westwood’s partner with a circle of friends that includes Lisa Stansfield, Agyness Deyn, Kate Moss (plus entourage) and our man Boy George. Plus Vivian Westwood, obviously. All are expected to show-up so, if like Bill Oddy you enjoy a spot of bird-watching (plus Boy George), then Studio Valbonne is possibly the finest place to start.

“Babe magnet or male tart?” is a question that often arises when discussing the predatory instincts of Calum Best – who’ll be hosting his own spot on the bill every week accompanied by Kimberly Stewart. “Tell me more, tell me more,” I hear you yell, like the long-lost offspring of Olivia Newton John in the process of orgasmus extremus. Well, Jade Jagger will be DJing in the main room with her Jezebel DJ set, as will Glenn D with his (apparently) “infamous mash-up sets”. SMASH! BANG! and DOUBLE WHOLLOP!

Rest assured, all budding Katie Price’s and Peter Andre’s, if such excitement isn’t enough to tantalize your taste-buds and tickle your g-spot, there are going to be many more surprises on the night. Ah, it’s like Hollyoaks meets Dirty Sexy Money for a few drinks with Sex and the City at China Whites but with better music and a “far-out” ambience that isn’t actually anywhere near as “WAG” as China Whites. “I’ll take two tickets please, and by God that red carpet better be cleaned”. NOTE: This event is strictly guest-list and invite only. Words: Dangerous Dave

Studio Valbonne

Thursday 8th May

10pm – LATE!

Studio Valbonne

62 Kingsley Street

London, W1B 5QN

Dress as you want to be remembered!

For guest-list enquiries contact www.jaylaenterprises.com or lauren@jaylaenterprises.com