The train-stations of London are awash with arseholes. Not just the ones between the bum-cheeks of the Capital’s people, but the people themselves.

Just because we haven’t shaved for two weeks, our hair is greasy and we stink of ash and booze, doesn’t mean we’re invisible.

All we’re doing is staring at the train schedules and listening to Lou Reed’s Transformer, eagerly anticipating the first gulp of a cool, crisp beer.

And yet they bang into us as though we’re not there, snarling and tutting and spitting their venom.

You know the people we mean.

They read broadsheet newspapers and eat sushi; drink rare wines and dine in fine restaurants; go on cruises and masturbate over lady-boys in Ratchaprasong.

If you’re searching for a friendlier crowd, look no further than Twisted Licks.

You’ve probably read previous Twisted Lick’s previews on Planet Notion. It takes place once a month at The Macbeth in Shoreditch and presents a night of quirky, funky and top drawer music.

The next event takes place on May 23rd (BANK HOLIDAY SATURDAY!!!), which means you can get totally wankered, hit the pub next day and not worry about the consequences of work on the Monday…

Performing live at Twisted Licks will be Banjo or Freakout.

The Italian maestro at the helm of this project seems to be achieving something very rare; namely, making computer generated scuzz accessible to even the most stubborn rock misfits.

Lyrically and musically haunting and beautiful, Banjo or Freakout is the sound-track to falling steadily on a come-down; all paranoid visions and unnaturally dead air.

Also playing live will be Gyratory System, who grabbed the Sunday Times prize of ‘Leftfield Album of The Year’ back in 2008.

Gyratory System sound like the moment you reach a drunken, drug-riddled peak and start the arduous descent straight over it. Which is better to listen to than to experience…

Namely because such experiences are rarely remembered next day when you’re peeling kebab meat from your face and prising your tongue from the roof of your mouth.

Headline DJs on the night will be 65 Days of Static, whose glitch beats, screaming post-rock guitars and industrial sound collages have earned them countless accolades in the media.

Radioproof will also be DJing on the night. Sadly we won’t be going; money problems and that. You probably should go. We hear it’s very good…

Twisted Licks

Saturday 23rd May

8pm – 2am

The Macbeth, 70 Hoxton Street,

Shoreditch, N1 6LP

Tickets: £6

MySpace.Com/TwistedLicks